chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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