3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Buhtt sex?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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