just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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