The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
