Kareoke will never be a sober sport
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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