Non-Jews are for practice
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
