everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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