Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
