so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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