idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
