idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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