I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
