her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
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