You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
