Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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