i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
