why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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