At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
