good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
We need a shit load of segways right now
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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