yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
You are the jesus of drinking
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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