some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
