I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize