Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Randomize
