I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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