I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
