glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Woke up backwards on a recliner
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
