Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
