I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize