i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
she looked like the before picture.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Randomize
