Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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