Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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