After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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