No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
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