yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
