Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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