so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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