And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
