Having a random hookup so left but love u
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
