ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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