his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
