You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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