Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
