drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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