Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
