Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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