I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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