you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Your topless pictures make me question reality
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
