Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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