Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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