you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
