I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
